`Ignited Child'
13th October 2010
"You cannot NOT communicate"
Many of us feel that communication means speaking or talking to others. However experts say that words constitute merely 8% of the process of communication and the balance 92% of communication takes place non-verbally. Facial expression, tonality, voice inflection and body language add to the quality of communication.
Children are very sensitive and observant. They listen to the content of communication taking into account the various parameters – verbal and non-verbal. The raised eyebrow, eye contact, facial expression, pitch emphasis etc. are all important. Whether we are aware of it or not, we are always communicating even when we are silent. We may intend to communicate something, but the children may actually receive the opposite what we intended. When we greet a child on his birthday, a child can easily understand the emotional content of our communication. In my experience, I found that the quality of communication between a parent and the child is very important to develop and maintain a healthy rapport.
When your facial expression does not match what you say, you communicate that you don't mean what you communicate. Just imagine you're watching a movie where the artist does not match his facial expression with the emotional content of the dialogue. How will you enjoy such an experience? This is what your child will experience when you praise your child without wearing a smile on your face, or when you discipline your child with a broad smile on your face! When you advice your child to be punctual, but you don't follow the same, you communicate that it does not matter if she is late to appointment.
You have to remember that we are always communicating, whether we are aware of it or not!
N.C. SRIHARAN
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